Sometimes it’s hard to take an objective look at your relationship with your partner. We tend to compare our relationships – and our partners – with other people we know. Are we doing better or worse than those around us, we might ask.
What if that’s not the best way to evaluate your relationship with your partner? Most people wouldn’t guess this, but research shows that 72% of marriages actually last a lifetime.1 And 80% of couples say they are happy or very happy with their spouse.2 How can you build a relationship that brings a lifetime of happiness, even when life is tough?

Strong and healthy relationships are ones where couples choose to love and support each other. They give each other room to grow, help each other achieve their goals, and encourage each other through difficult situations.

Remember, it’s just as important to be a good partner as to have a good partner. Many relationships can improve when both people decide to prioritize each other and learn healthy communication skills. Why not reach out to someone you trust?

Often, people stay in unhealthy relationships because they feel they really love the other person and they hope things will change for the better. If your partner is unwilling to get outside help or wants you to keep problems in your relationship secret, that could be a sign they don’t really want to change.

Remember, someone who loves you will treat you with respect, kindness, and patience. They will be honest with you and value your thoughts and feelings. And, of course, they won’t be violent or force sex on you.

Our relationships can have a major impact when we are making a pregnancy decision. Some people may tell you what they think you should do. But it is important to take responsibility for your own life. Before you follow someone else’s advice, ask yourself: do I believe this is the best thing for me to do right now? If not,take your time – and get whatever support you need – to make a healthy choice.

Healthy relationships can lead to GREAT marriages. Wondering what level of commitment is right for you? Our center’s experienced mentors can help you evaluate what the next step could be in your relationship.

Contact us for a no-cost consultation.

REFERENCES

1. Kreider, R. M., & Ellis, R. (2011). Number, timing, and duration of marriages and divorces: 2009. Current Population Reports, 70-125. Retrieved from http://www.census.gov/prod/2011pubs/p70-125.pdf (Accessed November 5, 2015.)

2. Based on analysis of numerous studies,, authors estimate a median 80% happiness rate. Feldhahn, S. C., & Whitehead, T. (2014). Happily ever after. InThe good news about marriage: Debunking discouraging myths about marriage and divorce (pp. 50,61). Colorado Springs, CO: Multnomah.

HOW TO HELP YOUR FRIEND FACED WITH AN UNPLANNED PREGNANCY

If you browse the internet and search in your google search bar for how to help a friend in an unplanned pregnancy, you are met with suggestions of support, comfort, listen and guide her. But, many are still at a loss after reading the countless articles in front of them and sipping on their 12th cup of coffee. Much like cramming for that final exam, your support for a friend in a crisis pregnancy could be a “pass or fail” grade and with life actively growing inside your friend’s body, let’s make sure this is an easy A for you and her.

First and foremost, ensure she knows you are there for her for the long haul. No matter her choice in the outcome of her pregnancy, it is important for her to fully understand she has a friend. She is likely going to need some time to process the entire situation and the reality of being pregnant before she even begins to think about her options. Encourage her to take all the time she needs to make an informed decision. Make sure fear or panic is not the source of her decision.

A good way to show support to her is to go with her to confirm her pregnancy. Missing a period, feeling sick, or even a positive test at home is not a guarantee of pregnancy. Encourage your friend to seek a safe place with lab-quality testing available to confirm her pregnancy. Some Pregnancy Resource Centers also offer free limited ultrasounds to confirm pregnancy and this will also give a good estimate of how far along in the pregnancy she currently is.

Once the pregnancy has been confirmed, you can be a great source of support for your friend. Simply knowing she has someone on her side can be vital to her wellbeing. Make sure she has all the information and resources available to her in order to make a fully-informed decision regarding the pregnancy. Be a safe place for her to talk about all her options in a non-judgemental atmosphere. Allow her to cry if she needs to let out her emotions. Reminding her frequently that you will be there for her NO MATTER WHAT.

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